Wednesday, Jan 22n3/03
1:00am
+World is Watching Explanations+

    In the midst of some updates, and realized that it's been a bloody month since I've even updated my journal so hello again and happy new year! There is so much going on I really don't know where to begin!
    I'm quite happy with a lot of things going on right now, I won't get into details, but those of you who know me probably know what I'm talking about... Another thing is I bought a cool new car - a hyundi tiburon, and it's the bomb - i love it. Work is slow, but fun, booze is flowing, things are good, and I'm very pleased - I'm newly motivated and quite ready for my CD release which is happening any time now!
    Why don't I have an exact time you may ask? Well, my CD is being pressed right now... that is where they take my disc, make a glass master of the CD-R (an enlarged, negative, glass image of the pits and grooves in the disc) stamp little melted metal discs into it, spray them with a clear coating, screen press them, and put them into the cases where the artwork is (the artwork that they have reproduced using a nice large printing press, on high quality paper!) The CDs are then cello wrapped (which is faaaar superior to shrink wrapping, for it doesn't cling, but lingers sexually over the case, making it look even glossier, newer and more professional) packaged in boxes, and then given to me! This whole process takes a couple of weeks, and that's where I'm at now. The artwork is done, the recording is done. I'm just waiting to get the product back. In the meantime I'm working on a date for a big CD release concert which I would love to make the biggest concert yet, get a good crowd, have fun, and most importantly sell a LOT of CDs!
    So i would like to talk about the CD for a little bit because I haven't really yet... and I want to get some of the themes straight. For one - it was originally planned to be a 10-song, 60min epic called "sosandra and dog" - a story in song form about this crazy girl who has all these bad things happen to her. But after thinking about it and working on it for nearly a year, I realized that my concept was incoherent and inconsistent, and the music at times was a little dull, and I wasn't happy with the recording. That's when I switched over to Matt Walsh, who is an amazing producer and musician, and we spent a few months re-recording a few songs from the sosandra bunch, and a few others, including some new ones. The record started to take shape, and rather than being a 'concept album' I now had a bunch of songs that were loosely themed around observations. Basically watching the world, seeing where one fits in, overcoming fears and insecurities, and figuring out the world. In the album are many little stories and songs about people and things - some of them refer to me, and some are about things I've observed, dreamed about, or just thought about. It all ties together in the theme of a person and their place in the world. The album now has 11 songs and runs about 50 minutes long! It was recorded on an old upright piano that has such a classy sound. I'll explain a bit more about the songs in detail...
    The album starts with BOY OBSERVATIONS a dark, solo piece written about the seedy underside of the gay scene. It's one of my favourites off the record, and matt walsh's recording really captures the feel. The song makes reference to hate crimes, and one recent in particular being the death of a local man Aaron Webster who was brutally beaten to death for his sexuality. The song speaks of male prostitutes and hustlers and seems to come to a dreary understanding and reality of this scene.
    WORLD IS WATCHING follows, the title track and 'single' (if I ever decide to get off my ass and try to get some radioplay!) for the new CD, and features a full band performance - it's a fast fun song for the girls. It's basically about trying so hard to fit in, and how a person's place in the world isn't as important (in the scheme of things) as they often think it may be. INSECURE/IMMATURE has similar themes but relates to the male side of things more than the female. It was originally written for the Sosandra and Dog album, and hints to stories of miscarriages, cancer, fears of death - but basically someone worried about the outcome of their life, and their choices at the present reflecting on that. But it's all put into the context of a relationship - one that isn't working in the case of this song! This is a really upbeat song, and Matt Walsh's drumming is so funky...
    SHE'S A SCORPION is another song written for Sosandra and Dog, and is specifically about the sosandra character. Scorpion is obviously tied into the fact that I'm a scorpio and possess many traits of that zodiac, and so does the character. That's how I relate to her in the song. It's basically about me and her going out for a coffee and talking about her horrible horrible past, and she's fearing the worst for her future. Probably my darkest song because it offers no optimism whatsoever! hahaha, it's really quite frightening and terrible when I think about it. But it's pretty impressive piano, and it's kind of catchy too.
    EMPTY TUNNEL is where the record takes a change of pace - I recorded it on my keyboard using a fender rhodes piano sound (which is btw, my favourite instrument in the whole wide world) and this song is probably my slowest ever... sweet, but also very dark and sad... it takes two stories (of people that I have observed in my life) and experiences, and puts them to the same conclusion that they need some more love in their life. But it's not too sappy - there are guns and blood in this song! JUST IN TIME (FOR XMAS TIME) follows, and it's another love song - kinda sappy, but sweet, and recorded nicely. It'll probably be a favourite among parents and grandparents - but honestly, it's quite sincere, and a more personal song that most of the rest with a very poppy, catchy tune.
    BURN THE BLACK DRESS is like short comic relief... just under 2 minutes long, this song is already a fan favourite. It's also written about the Sosandra character, and the goth scene in general - not so much the style, but more the attitude I've noticed from a lot of people. It's a very fun happy song, and the recording is totally cool - complete with bop-bop-bop's in the background, and a crazy little carnival organ solo! I FOUND GOD is next - it's got a really cool recording with phased vocals, heavily distorted synth, and me playing the acoustic guitar (barely!) but it's different than anything I've done. Talks about religion a bit, but more how people relate to faith in different ways. The song gives a few 'examples'
    The next song is the monster from the record - nearly 7 minutes, and a total true story of things that happened to me durring last summer as a direct result from alcohol abuse!!! It's humorous and fun at times, optimistic, and upbeat, but at the same time it has an underlying sadness to it. It's a true rollercoaster - LET'S TRY THIS AGAIN WHEN WE'RE SOBER outlines my personal experiences in a fun way - sort of a 'look back and laugh at the situation' kind of thing. The situation is nothing in specific... the song makes reference to a few different things that friends and family may pick up on, but I'll never give out the details! :)
    The last two songs finish off the album nicely - LAST NIGHT I DREAMED THAT WE BOTH DIED puts love and life into perspective by looking at a dream of death. The song is basically about the things one takes for granted and an 'if we died right now' kind of situation arises and one is faced with the regrets of the things they didn't say or do, as well as the things they with they had done differently. Written to sound like a dream, the song has a very unusual structure, and the changes are unique as well. It's one of the most beautiful recordings on the record with huge swells in the chorus of piano, layered organs, and warm synths. RED LIGHT closes the record, and it's probably my favourite of all the songs - maybe even of all the songs I've written. It's a bitter-sweet close... tells a story about someone who has clearly gone off the edge, and it's sad to see this person waste away, but the character in the song is taking that person's mistakes and using them to make better their own life. It's an empowering song with a really cool piano riff, and powerful vocals on the chorus. It really makes a nice finish.
    Well now that this is all done I realize it sounds more like I've written a review of my own album, but it's more that i needed to clear up a few details... perhaps after reading this a listener will have a better understanding and appreciation of the music. Hopefully this is interesting for some of you, and if you have any questions or want to chat about any of it just come see me on my forum!

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